It's Too Late
by seeleyboothfan
Summary: After the engagement was broken, what occurred when they ran into each other at the apartment that same evening? The barbs thrown at the restaurant were just warm ups to the hurt they unleashed in private. After all is said and done, is there really a hope for reconciliation? Basically a reaction piece/missing story to 6x01's Loser Like Me.


_It used to be so easy living here with you  
>You were light and breezy and I knew just what to do<br>Now you look so unhappy, and I feel like a fool_

As soon as Kurt returned to the apartment, he turned the shower as scalding as he could handle it and curled into a tight ball against the far wall, letting himself cry for the first time since he broke off the engagement. The was a chill resting in his bones that Kurt couldn't blame solely on the weather; the look on Blaine's face when he'd walked away had been biting, raw.

Even though he knew the apartment was empty, he still really only felt comfortable lowering his walls behind closed doors, alone. As the water turned tepid, Kurt still couldn't pull himself out of the shower. He blinked through the steadily falling tears, the water from the showerhead plastering his hair to his forehead and running in rivulets down his face.

Kurt hadn't meant to end everything. He'd been wanting to postpone their wedding, knowing that something was wrong and unable to find a way to fix it. When Blaine had pushed today, it had all come out, and not in the way Kurt wanted it too, but there was no way to take it back.

It was only when he started shivering that he turned the shower off and pulled himself upright. He stiffly pulled his old clothes back on, not bothering to look at himself in the mirror before exiting the bathroom.

Blaine, completely disheveled, eyes as puffy as Kurt's probably were, was frantically packing some clothes into a duffle bag. He jumped in shock when Kurt exited the bathroom, wiping freshly fallen tears from his cheeks.

"I was just getting a few of my things." Blaine said, voice gravelly, the way it sounded after he'd had a good cry. "I'll get out of your way."

It took a few seconds for Kurt to realize that Blaine was moving out; really, it should have been obvious, as it was the only solution to their predicament. As he watched Blaine shove a few more shirts in the bag, Kurt thought through all the companions they'd had with them in not that long ago. With Mercedes and Sam no longer in New York, where would Blaine go? "Where will you stay?"

"Like you care," he bit back, glaring at Kurt. Blaine zipped the bag up, the harsh sound of the zipper echoing in the apartment.

Kurt fell back a step at the bitter tone. "Blaine, I still lov-"

"Don't you dare," he growled with narrowed eyes. Blaine nodded back towards the chest of drawers where the majority of his clothes still lay. "I'll send for the rest later." Blaine shoved past him and hurried to the door.

Kurt couldn't let it end like this. "Blaine, wait. I can't let you leave thinking I don't love you anymore."

Blaine, face red with anger and fresh tears pooling in his eyes, stopped. He turned to face Kurt, face showing his distaste with the whole situation.

Kurt sighed. He wasn't prepared to talk this through now, not when all the emotions were still bubbling with anger, but he knew it was his only chance to explain it. "It's not that I stopped loving you, or that I never want to marry you. I do think we could get married…some day."

Blaine scoffed, wrapping an arm around his stomach, closing himself off from Kurt.

Kurt frowned, feeling the anger start to creep back through his body. "But the way we are right now, me included… there's something seriously wrong. I refuse to commit to us when we don't have it right." Even though Blaine wouldn't meet his gaze, Kurt continued. "We love each other and we want to make this work, but obviously there's something broken here, otherwise we wouldn't be constantly at each other's throats. I think some time apart could be good for us."

Blaine closed his eyes, shaking his head. "I can't do another break up and reunite, Kurt. That year we were apart… I barely survived. Somehow, I did survive and I fought to win you back. I thought we were finally through it all." Blaine opened his eyes, raised his head, and met his gaze with bloodshot eyes, looking defeated. "I'm too exhausted to fight for us again. It's now or never."

Kurt could feel it all falling apart. "But we'll fail if we keep at this right now. I don't want to hate you, Blaine."

Blaine took a deep breath, body sagged in despair. "If you let me walk out this door, I'm not coming back. Either you want this, or you don't."

It was obvious that Blaine had given up. They'd really come to the final moments. He'd push Blaine to the precipice and he was leaving the decision up to Kurt – to pull him back or let him jump. "You're really giving up this easily? You're not who I thought you were. Maybe it _is_ best that we're calling it off now."

"_We're_ calling it off?" Blaine asked incredulously, his formerly resigned face distorting with anger. "_We're_ not – _you_ are! You have to control _everything_. You can't even let go when it's just you and me, even when we're making love; you keep yourself distant. Why can't you just let go?"

Kurt was thrown at the bitterness in Blaine's voice. How dare he accuse Kurt of being distant. "Because I did let go once and you fucked some other guy!"

Blaine's nostrils flared in anger. "You said you forgave me, but it's obvious now that you never really did."

Kurt crossed his arms over his chest. "Because you were my first and I _thought_ only and you made it so the same would never be true for you. Do you know how disgusting it is to look at you and know someone else has seen you fall apart, touched you in ways I might never be able to?"

Blaine frowned, dropping his bag and matching Kurt's stance. "So I'm disgusting?"

Kurt huffed, head throbbing with the onset of what was probably going to be a killer migraine, beyond frustrated. "I didn't say that. God, you twist everything. You know what I meant."

"Except I don't. I never do. You never say what you mean."

"And you never say what you feel. You say whatever you think everyone wants to hear. Not everyone likes a brown-noser."

Blaine chuckled humorlessly. "And not everyone likes people as cold as you. You never said 'I love you' first. Do you even know what love is, or were you playing a part?"

Kurt felt the jab as strong as a knife to the heart. "Playing a part? You should look at yourself. Have I _ever _seen the real you or was it always the front you put up so that you could be the person you thought I needed, even though you always had it wrong? I don't need you there all the time. Everyone needs peace and quiet."

"Luckily for you, you'll be getting endless peace and quiet."

Kurt sighed. This was all going downhill so fast. Even if he'd wanted to fix it, there really wasn't a way out of this mess. Even with as angry as he was, he wanted to make Blaine realize what had brought them here. "I didn't want endless. I wanted space to regroup and come back together stronger. I won't marry you when I know this will all collapse right in front of our faces."

"The fact that you think you have all the say in ending this…" Blaine started, face falling into a miserable expression. "…just proves that my Dad was right."

Kurt's eyes narrowed. What did Blaine's Dad have anything to do with this?

"He said I let you walk all over me… that I'm some dog awaiting your every command…that I'm pathetic."

Kurt's heart couldn't help but break at the forlornness of his tone. "You're not-"

"I've never once gotten to make a decision in this relationship. Not where I go to school, not where we live, or what to wear… not anything." Kurt opened his mouth to rebuttal with the many times Blaine clearly made decisions, but he was cut off. "Not until I slept with Eli."

At that, Kurt's fury came back in a flash.

Blaine continued, faced twisted with revulsion. "My first real decision and look how well that turned out. He made me feel like shit, but it wasn't as bad as you've made me feel."

"Like you made me feel any better? When have you ever made me feel truly wanted? You're always chasing things that pull us apart: Jeremiah, Rachel, June… Eli."

"I learned from the best," he bit back.

"You bitch," he returned, venom lacing his words.

Blaine raised his eyes to meet Kurt's once more. "You knew how awful it felt when my Dad told us we were too young to get married…how little and unspecial he made our relationship seem. He said it wouldn't last because he thought we were jumping into marriage too early. I could brush off his words, because I trusted in our love. I trusted because I thought we were on the same page about us. I thought that we knew what we were and that we were going to make it the long haul. You have no idea how betrayed I felt to know you felt the same as him. Maybe all the names he called me are true. Maybe I am worthless."

"Blaine, no."

"Enough! I don't want to hear anything more you have to say, not when I realize exactly how you feel about me… about us."

The rollercoaster of this argument was making Kurt nauseous. He had wanted to make it all better, but Blaine was being callous with his words. "God, I'm so sick of this; don't put this all on me. You're not exactly the perfect partner."

"Because I had to be _your_ partner. You make it impossible to be around you."

"Screw you!" he shouted, voice almost breaking.

"Difficult to when you've refused to touch me all week," Blaine returned, words full of spite. "I should have known something was up."

"Yeah, well you've always been stuck in denial. I don't think you've ever really looked at a situation and saw reality."

"Where is reality when my entire life for the last few years has been completely dictated by you? God, I can't even wipe my ass without you judging me. Nothing will ever be good enough for you."

Kurt let out a harsh breath through his nostrils, mouth clenched in anger. "I'm sure it'll be easy to find someone better than you."

Blaine's expression was devestated, more so than it has been during the argument. "Maybe we've just been deluding ourselves pretending we were happy when we were really just looking for a way out."

"Maybe," Kurt agreed.

Blaine took a deep breath, as if steeling himself. Kurt could see the anger slowly replacing the hurt. "I'm glad it's all over. I don't think I could have stomached one more day devoting my life to you. How I ever thought I loved someone as cruel as you…"

"Maybe I never really loved you at all." Kurt knew it was a lie, but Blaine had slowly been turning the knife he'd stabbed in Kurt's back and he wanted to return the favor.

Blaine took a few steps closer to Kurt and held out his hand."Oh, I'd like my ring back too, if you don't mind," he said, all sickly sweet.

Kurt ripped the ring off his finger and flung it at Blaine, who barely managed to catch it. "I hate you."

Blaine met his angry gaze. "We're finally in agreement because I hate you too."

The door slamming behind him had a note finality.


End file.
